1st stage
It can be difficult to know if you are a victim of domestic violence.
Here are some links that can help you demystify the whole thing.
- What is domestic violence?
- Couple’s quarrel or domestic violence
- The four criteria of violence
- The cycle of violence
- Forms of violence
- Post-separation violence
- What are my rights?
It can be very difficult to see the signs at the beginning of a relationship because the violent person camouflages everything through different attentions and proofs of love. The aggressor gets to know you quietly to know better where to attack afterwards.
If you have any doubts, it is always better to validate. You can call a shelter for help and accommodation to confirm or refute your doubts.
Here are some examples already observed in some cases:
- Says that all their exes were “crazy;”
- Wants to control finances for example: "You’ve spent too much lately. I'll limit your credit card;”
- Pressure at the sexual level, such as sulking if you refuse or manipulation by saying that you refuse for this or that reason, for example "are you cheating on me?”
- Comments negatively on your clothes and asks you to change;
- Threatens to leave you if you don’t do what they tell you;
- Continually reacts against women;
- Pressures you to be in a relationship with them quickly.
Preparing for your departure can be a stressful moment and involve several fears.
Here are tools allowing you to prepare your protection scenarios, as well as prepare an emergency departure.
https://sosviolenceconjugale.ca/fr/outils/sos-infos/preparer-son-depart-une-etape-delicate
At La Re-Source, we accept all people who identify as women. We have an inclusive team and are in contact with organizations to adequately support people in the LGBTQ+ community.
A shelter is a community environment, which means that you will share your daily life with other women and their children.
A life code and some tasks to do are set up in order to maintain a harmonious climate in the house and within the group.
This is a 1st stage before your new life and the workers are there to help you in your steps, your recovery of control and to accompany you in your journey at the level of domestic violence.
In the first stage, we have 5 family rooms and 2 single rooms, for a total capacity of 7 women and 12 children.
A stay in 1st stage is usually for a maximum of 3 months.
Unfortunately, pets are not allowed.
When you call us, we can discuss other solutions with you and give you referrals
Service dogs or guide dogs are allowed, due to their necessity to the owner.
There are no accommodation fees, everything is free! The room, the food, the services, EVERYTHING!
If your children still live under your roof and are dependent on you, they are welcome to stay in the shelter, even if they are 18 years old and over!
Professionals on the case will have the opportunity to come to the shelter, if useful and necessary. Given the confidential address, it is your duty to validate with the interveners if this may be possible.
At La Re-Source, we offer bilingual services, so women can do the assessment in either French or English. We also have some team members who speak other languages.
If the woman speaks a language that no case worker is proficient in, we can work with an interpreter during the assessment and during the accommodation.
In the first stage, since the address is confidential, it will unfortunately not be possible to invite relatives to the house. Only the person concerned and the children can know the address of the house.
The same applies to transportation. No one is allowed to pick you up or transport you at la Re-Source, except authorized taxis or professionals. Meeting points are established to meet people from outside.
No problem! When you are in accommodation, you can enter and exit at your leisure, we are a resource that is there to help you and no one is obliged to be there. It’s like being at home, but with six other families!
If you work, if you are studying, if you are a caregiver or if you do any other activity, you can continue to go about your business!
Before accepting you, we will have to assess your level of autonomy. Some physical conditions can be accommodated at La Re-Source. However, there are some limitations because of the way the shelter is built, for example, we have no wheelchair access.
The address is transmitted to the new person at the time of admission.